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Tuesday 13 December 2011

Luckily I've found one real joke

Music of the classical (straight, formal, posh, Mozart) variety is not a terribly fruitful field for humour. Often, only musicians understand the jokes.

In historical re-enactments of Haydn’s Symphony 45 each musician in turn stops playing during the final adagio, snuffs out the candle on his music stand and departs the stage, leaving just two muted violins at the end. You can Wiki it if you want to find out why. I have never seen such a performance but a musical friend has and was mildly diverted. The audience usually laughs and those listening on the radio are baffled if they are not in on the joke.

In a much more cruel – but comic – musical event I played a central role. During a very boozy pre-Christmas dinner for the editorial staff of the newspaper I worked on I foolishly elected to play several carols on my trumpet. Afterwards I went into the next room for a pint and found a sub-editor I greatly admired propping up the bar. “Who was that awful bastard in there playing carols?” he asked, his atheism offended.

G. B. Shaw used to write musical criticism under the name Corno di Bassetto. He was halfway through a recital by a rather miniaturised Scandinavian women pianist “when the coughing started”. From then on he heard nothing. His recommendation: that the coughers be taken out into adjacent Trafalgar Square, laid in the roadway, “where a warm steam-roller should be passed over their chests”.

Finally the link below – which is genuinely funny – arrived from HHB and was sent to her by her Dad, Avus. What makes this so good (sustained throughout) is the way board movement reflects the music. CLICK

8 comments:

  1. LOVED those monks.

    So did you keep up playing the trumpet then.

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  2. I like in particular the little monk at the end of the line who had to jump bring his letter into view.

    Shaw seems to anticipate Jeremy Clarkson in his recommendation for the treatment of coughers.

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  3. If Handel had seen this, he might have decided to add a few lines to his lyrics!

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  4. EB: My trumpeting career is summed up in this post which dates back to September 2008

    http://bbworkswell.blogspot.com/search?q=battle+of+Jericho

    Plutarch: I felt that the inclusion of "warm" helped distance GBS from Clarkson.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yes, the "silent monks" was rather inspired, I thought.

    The "warm" (GBS)definitely makes a difference. Compare:
    "I will give you my support"
    to
    "I will give you my warm support"

    (images of it just having been removed from nether regions!)

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  6. Do you still have the trumpet then?

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  7. Avus: Normally I'm prepared to go on asking questions for ever. But I think I'll draw a line under this comment of yours. Perhaps you think me prudish?

    EB: Yes I still have it - it's about 18 in. away from my foot as I type. I take it you'd like to turn it into a flower vase. Well, go ahead, make me an offer.

    ReplyDelete