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Saturday, 14 February 2015

Could it be indigestion?

Is a 2254-word story too long for you? (See Compost, if you like, posted earlier today) How about a shortie on Valentines?

Hardly out of the egg I wrote a four-liner.

Hope springs eternal in the human breast,
This saying applies to mine,
All other cares from my heart you will wrest,
If you'll be my Valentine.

Very anatomical. When did you last use "wrest"? (means forcibly pull). Probably never. Chances are you aren't old enough. I didn't send it to anyone, hadn't got a stamp. Let's move on.

Aged 15 I sent Pam Bayley one and she thanked me for it, while we were both waiting at the bus-stop. Formally, as if I'd lent her a garden implement. Shiny dark hair and a cheerful, assured manner, that was Pam. Hope she's not dead.

Aged 28, married to VR, I sent her just one Valentine. "Hi," I said, "just passed my driving test." You think that's a bit too English, too remote? A day later I had to tell her I'd just been made redundant from the magazine I worked on.

Since then, zilch.
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4 comments:

  1. Rouchswalwe14 February 2015 at 17:59

    I saw a Valentine's Day card the other day with a picture on the front of an elderly couple. She asks him, "why don't you say you love me anymore?" He responds, "I told you once. If anything changes, I'll let you know."

    Do I dare admit that I really like the photo of cupid face down with an arrow stuck in 'im?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Roderick Robinson15 February 2015 at 08:43

    RW (sZ): When I sent a Valentine to Pam Bayley I was infantile and knew no better. If I were now the subject of a time warp I wouldn't depend on words acquired in a supermarket. Thus the Valentine sent to VR (staying with her Mum at the time) only incidentally acknowledged the date.

    You'll notice the arrow projects from the cupid's back - implying he was in retreat. That love had flown. You could say he got what he deserved,

    ReplyDelete
  3. Blonde Two15 February 2015 at 15:55

    I only remember once receiving a Valentine. When I found out who had sent it, my words were, "But he's too short."

    Being female, I married him anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Roderick Robinson16 February 2015 at 07:01

    Blonde Two: Now that's just too poignant. Height has always been VR's criterion for male sexiness. Many Hollywood stars have fallen by the wayside for that very reason. I am 11½ in. taller than her.

    While your gender has never been in any doubt, given the way you write, I don't see you as an impulse buyer. Not that it matters, of course. It was only a theory you infringed, never a regulation. In any case, you were right to do so

    ReplyDelete

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