It's more than a herb

One reason why life's indistinct.
Below: Once they were slip-on
casuals, now kind of depraved

I intend to become a sage.

My hair (uncut since late summer) fits this new role as does wearing shoes past their prime and my refusal to change into cleaner clothes.

You protest! Being a sage demands wisdom, deep wells of knowledge, sympathy for others and an air of tranquillity. My blog is immediate proof I lack all these qualities and more. Too true.

But sages are best known for saying things which appear in dictionaries of quotations centuries later. Aphorisms, apophthegms, “sayings” in fact. I thought I’d take that route.

Forget wisdom, aim to be quotable. Say things others aren’t saying. And what better opportunity than during a pandemic?

What are people saying about covid-19? The usual stuff. That they’re bored, afraid, lonely, frustrated, condemnatory of politicians, unable to cope with life, hating those who form crowds and go drinking, worrying ceaselessly about TV “repeats”.

Some might be fibbing. If there were no covid-19 and it simply rained for a few days would they behave differently? Might many people – especially those who are retired like the Robinsons – be unwilling to admit that covid-19 wasn’t affecting them half as much as they belly-ached? And were ashamed about this?

Saying one: Covid’s like normal but with more TV coverage.

Through the windows we watch the movements of our neighbours. What’s going on in their noggins? What are their motives?

Saying two: Covid’s DIY psychoanalysis. Happily cheaper.

The incidence of covid death among Trump-believers must surely be higher than among normal folk. Yet they remain fearless

Saying three: Trump’s 2024 campaign will feature suicide-bombers.

London’s a great place to live but it costs a lot. And not just in cash terms. Togetherness could kill you.

Saying four: Typical Londoner: Watch the wimps moving to the ‘burbs.