… although with some I didn’t try all that hard.
Dancing. Despite singing lessons I’ve never mastered the physical expressions of rhythm. My excuse: in dancing the fella leads his (presumably) female partner; this seems anti-feminist.
I’d like to dance. Forty years ago, in a Roman Catholic church hall, I drank enough very cheap Scotch to shuffle round the floor with various extremely tolerant partners. And that was that.
Steering a motorbike with sidecar. To guide a two-wheel bike one simply leans into the bend. With a trike you tug on the handlebars, losing all grace. Not a form of locomotion which attracts me. Looks elderly.
Kiss women socially. So far always a disaster. All guidance welcome.
Complete a Tolkien novel. Or even open one.
Garden creatively. I’ve over-posted on this many times. Misleading quote: “A garden is a lovesome thing.” Response: “Wherein I might flex my muscles if I had any.”
Open a champagne bottle without “popping” the cork. Though I’m not sure this is a worthwhile skill.
Tolerate lace-up shoes. Give me Velcro every time. And a narrower belly
Forgive someone. If you can remember the reason for the offence forgiveness surely becomes impossible. Unpleasantness is born out of emotion whereas forgiveness is an intellectual decision. The two don’t tie up.
Bellyache about rain. Ours is a temperate climate, for goodness sake. I have sampled extreme summers and winters in distant lands; gentle rain is a much more acceptable option.
Sentimentalise cats. Their savage ancestry is only partially hidden; they kill for fun; their poo smells something rotten.
Trim my rh little toe nail. During my youth cheapness was the only criterion for buying shoes. Hence some toes are now banana-shaped.
Drink wine costing less than £6 a bottle. Do I need to explain?
I agree with most but...
ReplyDeleteDancing. I was sent by Mother to Braybrooks for private dancing lessons, mainly catering for boys from Bradford Grammar and girls from Bfd. Girls' Grammar. I learnt nothing because I was terrified when we had to choose a partner and remained so throughout.
I can open champers without the pop but prefer to have at least a token pop.
Your "take"( a word borrowed from your favourite newsreader) on cats is s bit radical, but I find I just about agree with you.
Sir Hugh: Dancing. Same with me - then. But it was aeons ago and there's been enough time for me to change my mind (see my earlier post on this very subject). Dancing is a physical aspect of music, there's a logic to it; I'd be prepared to give it another go, assuming I could find a quiescent partner.
DeleteI'm intererested to know which of my opinions about cats qualifies as "radical".
Using your headings, to save too deep a personal consideration (after all, " zer iss nothing a German officer cannot do" to quote Gert Froede in " Those magnificent men in their flying machines):
ReplyDeleteDancing: Can just about manage a walz - it was a way to get close to girls when young, but at 82 what's the point?)
Motorbike and sidecar: they are great fun. I had five of them when I had a young family, Very safe. You could put them into a deliberate side skid on ice and, with a twitch of the bars could put them straight. Insurers used to halve your bike's premium if you attached a chair.
Kiss women socially: See "dancing"above and my reasons.
Tolkien Novels: I enjoy the Lord of the Rings and read its three volumes to my young but mature kids as a bedtime story - one chapter at a time. My daughter still refuses to see the film as she wants to preserve my intonations as I read it, long ago.
Gardens: I agree
Champagne: I loathe it. Fizzy wine. Ugh!
Lace up shoes: Always - velcro fastenings are a step nearer the grave
Forgiveness: Just simply cancel them from your life and get on with living.
Rain: I enjoy it (but not when motorcycling). My daughter-in-Oz longs for our English climate - mud and puddles.
Cats: Had one as a pet once, but so much more prefer dogs. Although Churchill (who kept pigs) said "Cats ignore you, dogs fawn on you, but pigs treat you as an equal"
Toenails: Increasing age makes them difficult to trim. I pay my wife's visiting foot lady to do mine too.
Avus: For me bikes are first and foremost modes of transportation; their romantic appeal pales in the face of getting from A to B. The idea of riding them over icy roads doesn't appeal at all; on those occasions a train is greatly preferable since it also opens up opportunities to read and (from a professional point of view) write. I tried out a combination in the car-park when I was working for MotorCycling and quickly concluded that attaching a third-wheel sacrificed a bike's unique quality - it's agility. But the journey was always more important than the vehicle, and the minute I could afford a car I bought one.
Delete"just cancel them from your life" seems to suggest you've never been insulted or assaulted hard enough. It also suggests a binary mind (On/Off with nothing in between). Read Freud on the subject. Suppression is a delusion; ill-effects are wont to reappear at other times and in other places, often in another form, but equally unpleasant. But here's a caveat: the patient rarely recognises the link.
Tolkien. I was less parental, recognising that my burden would be lighter if my daughters could do their own reading and come to their own conclusions.
How do you get on with fizzy beer? I congratulate you on your antipathy towards champagne; it's always a good idea to dislike stuff that costs a lot.