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Saturday, 25 July 2026

A belated thank-you

Taken only a few days ago, I thought this
 expression shows- quite vividly - the result
of devoting oneself to language; the face of
one who has never seen a Dr Who episode
Time passes, on balance less beneficially. I'm writing better than ever before but life is at its worst ebb as my other half slides into oblivion. Comment if you wish but please, please, even if you feel inclined, don't sympathise. There is nothing neither you nor I can do to help.

Even though the visit to France (qv) proved to be a brief exception

As with all misery, irony is just around the corner. I've always condemned nostalgia on the grounds that I mistrust the Golden Era way of thinking. That things were better decades ago merely because they occurred in the past. For me the past was left wrapped in a shapeless bundle in my birth city as the future brought with it a growing sequence of happy revelations.

Until three years ago. And now I trawl the earlier years of Tone Deaf, plus its predecessor Works Well, for scraps of comfort.

To find something I've only just recognised: a genuine sense of community.

Some background is necessary. Since age 11 I have written continuously. Thousands of letters to my widest family, articles for newspapers and magazines, reports about my confined existence in the Royal Air Force, speeches to restless audiences, eloquent appeals to US editors that they consider me for employment, amateurish attempts at fiction, a blog, rather more professional attempts at fiction, and, most surprisingly of all, verse.

In all these outpourings, over 79 years, I wrestled with language as – later – I wrestled with singing: in both instances to achieve an individual voice. I was very serious about this, to the point where self-centredness got the upper hand. Understand this:  writers deserve not a shred of understanding. Their burden is self-imposed and the great majority becomes insufferable outside what they write. To some extent truly dedicated plumbers end up in the same hole.

On reflection I find I’ve been remarkably lucky. Blogs invite responses and – lo and behold – I enjoyed my own Golden Era. For a few years it seemed there were others out there in cyberspace, all individual voices, all capable of grasping ideas and expanding them according to the true meaning of conversation. Driven by a desire to enrich rather than to dispute.

To them this belated expression of gratitude. My misery continues but it would have been crass of me, having discovered this phenomenon, not to have publicised it.

12 comments:

  1. What a relief, after many daily inquiries, to find a post headed not by a picture of a tiny stereo player, but by such a striking portrait. Is that a selfie?
    I’m off to the EcoDrop to unload three days worth of yard trimmings, and I will rush to beat the heat of the day.
    Your writing is fabulous as ever, but I’m puzzled. Why, in: “Their burden is self-imposed and the great majority becomes insufferable outside what they write.” Is it not “become”. I’m no technician, but with “ great majority” being singular and t”they” seeming plural, how is this choice made. It felt awkward to me.

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    1. MikeM: I didn't check but majority may have both both a singular (eg, if areas were being compared) or multiple meaning but grammatically it is singular; otherwise "majorities".

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  2. Robbie, you have become a painting by Lucien Freud. He must have returned from wherever in order to make this remarkable work.

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  3. It may be correct and if so I bow to the informed, but I have to say it jarred with me, but of course it may be just a typo?.

    It seems that blogging has more or less died a death. I now only have two regular commenters and rather see my efforts as a personal diary. As you say it can be a source of some interest and possibly sstisfaction to look back on from time to time. For me that is valuable becsuse my memory has always been a bit of a lace curtain and sometimes it is important to be able to pinpoint past happenings.

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  4. Sir Hugh: Blogging was always counter-intuitive and it's now more so. Clichés can help.

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  5. To change the subject, even if you think you know it well , we all should listen every now and then to Beethoven's 5th. I have just come from this version where the conductress uses fingers rather than baton to mesmeric effect and enjoys every moment.
    https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m002zbl8/bbc-proms-2026-beethovens-fifth-at-the-proms?seriesId=b007v097-manual-1-proms_2026

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  6. Sir Hugh: Better still ensure that music is readily accessible; then it's more likely to be played. I took the fiirst step more than twenty years ago by transferring all the music I had on LPs (barring some discs which uttered more snap,crackle and pop than music) to CDs. Thus, no need to manipulate a pick-up arm. Ten years later the technology had moved on and I realised I could only play CDs in the room where they (all 700 of them) were stored. It was an exhausting project but I then transferred the CDs' digital content to the hard disc of a lap top, from which I was able to select music on the laptop's screen and play it via my hi-fi Marantz amplifier. Thus I could easily select and play individual works from what would once have been a CD carrying more than one work. Also, no more getting down on my knees and ensuring the CDs were returned to the boxes whence they came.

    More particularly this greatly improved accessibility. My music collection consisted of 7600 individual files varying from songs lasting three minutes to individual movements of Bruckner symphonies at three-quarters of an hour. Stick a 128 GB chip into a holder and stick the holder into the laptop's USB slot and after several hours the whole collection could be transferred to something occupying half the space of a postage stamp. Having done this a second time I had all my music available on the portable system I use to play music to VR AND on my car audio system.

    It may sound complicated but the transfer process is quickly learned and then all you need is time. As you drive off to one of your walks you are able to listen to music you know you like instead of having to listen to BBC3's Composer of the Week who just happens to be a little-known Albanian

    Couldn't play the Fifth I fear although it seems the whole of last year's Prom is available on the Web.

    I once suggested you tried a different format for photo captions. This used to be simple, now not so. However there is a further solution but I've already used up too much space here.

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  7. I am having problems with Blogger. When I type a post half the text at the end of the line disappears and th rest of that line of text can only be accessed by a slider at the bottom of the page. That is tiresome to say the least. If I look in Preview I can see the text cpmplete and it publishes properly on th blog post. I have Googled this problem and there are a variety of suggested solutions which would involve me in delving into advanced (to me) technical manipulation and time that I would prefer to be used doing something else. As for the captions I know you critcised my use of centre justification and I now rarely use that. B;logger also refuses (some of the time) to centre justify my photos. All that means that a post for a normal walk can take me a whole morning. That is also partly due to my woefully increased impaired typing skills with many typos to correct.

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  8. Most of the blogs I read are written by people of a similar age to me. It seems the younger lot have decamped to Instacrap or whatever. I like blogs, it allows for slow thinking and consideration.

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  9. Jean: Perhaps because older people have more spare time. On the other hand good posts demand effort and imagination, qualities not neccessarily available in youth.

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  10. Every once in a while you make me laugh. The bit about the dedicated plumbers, for instance. Still and all, I think you may be right.

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