Regarding my own obsequies I was utterly shocked in the USA by the enormous costs of corpse disposal there. I determined that any money spent on my departure would be devoted to pleasure and not to ritual. Body shipped to the hospital for anatomy instruction, music and soft drinks. No good dispensing fine wine, the mourners (if any) would almost certainly arrive by car.
Note “if any”. Neither VR nor I have led sociable lives and any attenders from outside the family circle would be unexpected and probably panhandlers.
Streaming is probably expensive but it must – surely – encourage the widest participation. Hence the wryness; I can’t see it paying off for me. But there was one novel experience. Pat’s wife (somehow I can’t bring myself to write “widow”) had let me know she wanted my “RIP? Nah” post to be read. Since I wasn’t there a woman (whose name I missed) stood in. Those who know anything about my fiction will be aware of my feminophilism and this pleased me greatly. Better still, those listening were denied my West Yorkshire whinge.
Pat was certainly a polymath when it came to all branches of science, national and international politics, energy conservation, computers, website design, trade unions, the Catholic church, golf and being, generally, well-read. When he joined the magazine I was working on we immediately started arguing. I tested him by asking for a definition of “riparian”. He provided it. Relations became more civilised for the following fifty years.
We've attended several streamed funerals of late. I think that all started during the lockdown period. If you have a church funeral, as far as I know, it's a free service offered from the parish as they all seem to now have live cameras for mass etc. - one funeral was streamed from a Quaker Hall. Obviously, a donation would be expected.
ReplyDeleteWhile it was good for us to be "present" at funerals of dear people in countries further afield, you are only a spectator, no hugs, no personal condolences, no hands to hold.
Sabine: In my case I was slightly more than a spectator: I was able to listen to my own stuff read aloud by someone with a much more civilised voice than my own. A variant on the experience when I left one form of employment, wrote five short satirical playlets to mark my departure, and acted as the linking narrator between this quintet of scenes. As to my own performance I cannot comment but I have to say there is nothing quite like listening to an audience laughing at jokes one has manufactured.
ReplyDeleteI note you do not disapprove of a word I felt had marred many a funeral utterance for me. See my post "RIP? Nah."
I recently "attended" a memorial service for an old friend via zoom. I was so happy to have the opportunity, as I wouldn't have been able to make it to Philadelphia for the service otherwise.
ReplyDeleteColette: I would have thought that the USA, with its inordinate distances, would have truly welcomed streamed funeral services. Or are inter-city flights still as cheap as they were in the late sixties when I lived there?
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