"It will leave a scar," said Dr X."Yeah, but will it add character to my face?"
"I prefer not to guess," said Dr X neutrally. I pondered: adding character implied character already existed. During a long lifetime I haven't gathered a scrap of evidence to support this. A serious lapse.
I was asked what I'd done for a living. Mentioned journalism, and elaborated, saying I once visited Venezuela. "To do what?" "Observe a steel plant," I said. "Oh," said my audience.
Professional Bleeder was in the waiting room, happily sustained by her Kindle. She told me other patients had grumbled at the time I was taking in surgery - two hours in total. None grumbled when I appeared and it was only when I caught sight of my face in a window and noticed the size of the dressing that I understood why.
As we walked towards the bus station I noticed people staring at me then averting their eyes. It gave me a sense of power. No doubt illusory.
On Friday there will be a Wound Review.
SON-IN-LAW Darren gave me this personalised tea-towel for Christmas. The tiny circle of my novel readers will recognise its origins. I am considering converting it into a body gilet.SUBSEQUENT COMMUNICATIONS
Coms 1 (text). Grandson Ian to Daughter 1 - his Mum: "Can't wait until the Wound Review. Will he be using the star system: one star (worst), five stars (best)?"
xxx
Coms 2 (text). Daughter 2: "Is The Quibbler - ie, RR - OK?"
Daughter 1: "He's toying with mixing kirs (ie, white wine and cassis liqueur)."
Daughter 2: "Tell him to stop toying and start pouring."
xxx
Coms 3 (email). RR: "Prezzie transferred. Alas the post-surgical dressing has so thickened my head, the r/h sidebar of my glasses pressses onerously on the wound which is beginning to lose the effects of the anaesthetic. It’s not glamorous being old I can tell you. Grandad."
Grandson Ian: "Thank you very much. Hope you feel better soon and your head returns to normal thickness."
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| After Christmas dinner, courtesy Occasional Speeder, we watched the Walter Disney CGI movie "Frozen" 
CHARACTER-FORMING? The Practice Nurse thought so and is looking forward to taking the 14 stitches out next Wednesday. For my money leaving the stitches be seems more decorative. I'm having the extracted stitches woven into a basket - ant-size.
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Good heavens, what happened?! (If I may be so presumptuous to ask.) I hope you aren't in as much pain as that bandaged spot looks like it must be. Hope you recover quickly.
ReplyDelete(Not the best way to usher in the new year. Nor the worst, thank heavens!)
Crow: They said it was a minor op. But they were the ones wielding the garden tools.
ReplyDeleteIs it significant that you didn't review Frozen?
ReplyDeleteHope the wound heals quickly and gives you a characterful scar. Then when asked (if anyone dares ask) about its origin, you can make up a rollicking tale.
ReplyDeleteAch! You can always say it was a sword wound. Heal up quickly!
ReplyDeleteSir Hugh: Not at all. I read the Radio Times, bus timetables, the instructions on boxes of paracetemol (quite recently) and the Settings screen on my smartphone without feeling the need to review any of them.
ReplyDeleteNatalie: None of my tales are rollicking. I aim to plumb the absolute depths of human experience.
Beth: You forget, I never went to university and never ever to a German one. In any case the Germans now use shotguns.
"normal thickness"...priceless.
ReplyDeleteThis is what happens when I don't look in on TONE DEAF for a week?! I am reminded of the scar (same spot) on the face of the main character, Ross, in the Poldark television series. He got his in the Revolutionary War.
ReplyDeleteIan is definitely your grandson.
Please take care and I hope the pain abates in time for you to enjoy the Silvester!!
Heroes must have a scar. Now you must go on quest. Preferably a great, challenging quest.
ReplyDeleteAnd I want to hear a good lie about it all!
Heal well, feel better. Agree with the Swallow about Ian.
RW (zS): Now you see the lengths I'll take to call attention to myself. The scar, with stitches still attached, feels like a furry caterpillar crawling across my temple. A benign creature I assure you.
ReplyDeleteTis true about Ian, he is both cruelly cool and coolly cruel. He's convinced I'm wasting my substance.
Marly: A great, challenging quest with much smiting (since I'm enamoured with the past participle "smote"). Effortlessly you have detected my state of mind and my aims. Lies will follow but they will be called fables.
Switching from one myth to another, Ian will be my Loki.
Looks very impressive, RR. Now all you need is a black eye patch to complete the piratical illusion. Or get yourself a snap-brim trilby and well tailored dark suit (and possibly carry a violin case)
ReplyDeleteJoking aside, that looks painful and I hope your head gets thinner soon.
I am sure we all look forward to general word-smoterage and a manly scar and fables. Happy New Year!
ReplyDeleteAvus: I am not seeking to be anyone other then a fiercer, uglier, more assertive version of who I am at present. 2018 will need such a person. The prose will be harder, declarative, sparser and wide-ranging; a scar will help. Enhanced, perhaps, by cosmetics.
ReplyDeleteMarly: "A manly scar" - might that make me seem anti-feminist? I trust not because I am relishing the thought that most of those smitten (A less vigorous participle) will be lads. Youth's too good for them.
Yes, we are looking forward to New Year fables with smoting!
ReplyDeleteHappy Sylvester, lieber Robbie und Alle!!
That thing on the side of your face looks very much like a caterpillar. Could it be measuring you for a cocoon? I wish you a complete and speedy recovery, Robbie...and a less invasive New Year!
ReplyDelete