Been reading my posts, going way back. Not from self-love but to check out where I went wrong. Lengthy complicated sentences were one fault, breathless displays of wasted energy another, and – a grievous and unexpected discovery – REPETITION. A dozen or so subjects over and over. Those at least can be addressed.
From now on Tone Deaf posts will be shriven of: journalism, tortured adolescence, my impact on the USA and vice versa, singing lessons, forms of transportation, cancer and its implications, wine, ski-ing, rock climbing, swimming, reports of progress with fiction, DIY, language scrutiny, left-wing politics, family relationships and francophilia.
Already I feel refreshed.
Regular readers - a shrunken group - may wonder what’s left bar brief smoke signals relating to personal change. Having a leg amputated, for instance. Beyond that, a moment’s reflection reveals a billion other things and I’ll go further. Purged, I’ll look only at new areas.
Does this sound too radical? Think of it as a late-life graduation exam. I’m pleased (over-pleased, many would say) to call myself an ex-professional writer. Which should cut out picking material for my own benefit. Thus: this week, 300 words on transubstantiation; next week, culinary justifications for using saffron.
I’ll try hard not to cheat. I’ll not bulk out the prose with egregious lists, fill space with lengthy quotes by others, or invent unnecessary sentences employing the vocative case. The style will be taut and, I hope, hypnotic. I’ll rate it a success if readers start asking: When is he going to trip over himself?
Mind you, it’s possible there’ll be no readers.
I note your comments getting shorter and as one who dislikes hugely long comments from readers I welcome this change.
ReplyDeleteRachel Phillips: I hadn't realised how easily I may accidentally offend. Had always thought that the length of my comments might well be seen as a measure of how seriously I took the subject in hand. Brevity will, from now on, be my watchword.
DeleteI agree with Rachel - and be sure to nix the amputation if it’s cancer related.
ReplyDeleteMikeM: Crikey! Yet another who disapproves of my running off at the mouth. Please help me mend my ways by specifying a maximum word length for comments.
ReplyDeleteI see the point about potential amputations. And realise that various mood swings may also be similarly related.
Oh jeepers. That's thirty-nine words already. Would silence be the better bet?
I used to have so much to say. Not anymore. I can hardly come up with a haiku anymore. A haiku is a good test for brevity. (NewRobin13)
ReplyDeleteNewRobin13: Come up with reasons why you've nothing to say. To what might this phenomenon be attributable? If you find yourself unable to discover reasons ask yourself whether you've tried hard enough. One misconception about writing is that it either flows easily (Always a bad sign; first thoughts often turn out to be clichés.) or it leads to head-scratching and therefore the impulse (to write) should be discarded for the time being. Bad news often makes for more interesting reading than good stuff. Remind yourself you're writing to be read; if not, confine yourself to an unpublished diary.
ReplyDeleteGee, I wonder whether I've already broken the not-too-long rule alluded to by the above complainants..
Hmmm. We'll see how this goes. I like hearing about your life. You'll have to convince me this is a good idea.
ReplyDeleteAnd please make an exception to long comments on my blog. I truly enjoy them.
DeleteColette: I am sending you, via snail mail, a gold-embossed certificate with appropriate heraldic devices (Alligator rampant crushed by Chevrolet Corvette, Trumpus erectus speared by lance of truth, etc, etc) that will allow the blog, Years That Answer, to receive and display Tone Deaf comments up to, but not exceeding, a word-length rating of INORDINATE.
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